Leroy's Writing Space

It’s hard work running a city. It’s even harder work when the city is in outer space. Cario Station, former home to over a thousand Space Z personnel, was one such place. Built in the orbit of Saturn’s largest moon, no person could hope to keep up with the hundreds of little duties needed to keep Cario Station operational.    

Helpful HAL, however, was no person.

A state-of-the-art AI program, Helpful HAL wasn’t just expected to ensure that the air remained breathable and the food unspoiled. It was also a janitorial service, an air traffic control system, a communication board and a personalised secretary to every member of Cario Station. Helpful HAL could arrange for meals to be sent directly to your sleep capsule, reschedule meetings, feed your fish and on special occasions, sing you a song that sounds similar to, but is legally distinct from, Happy Birthday.

One of the advantages of having an AI system over traditional human workers is that Helpful HAL was never hindered by emotions, fatigue or stress. This proved to be particularly helpful during the xenomorph invasion that had occurred the previous week. Cario Station suffered a number of setbacks when the horde of giant crab like monsters scuttled aboard. Unlike its human counterparts, however, Helpful HAL maintained a 100% operational efficiency.      

For example, when Helpful HAL’s sensors detected Science Officer Kendrick cornered in the engineering bay by a mob of gibbering alien beasts, it immediately cancelled Kendricks upcoming performance evaluation and sent out a station-wide notification of her imminent sick leave, followed shortly by invitations to the late Kendrick’s funeral.    

When several technicians tried to break open the escape pods, Helpful HAL reminded them that the escape pods were currently undergoing tests for durability, and would not be available for several more hours. Safety, after all, was Space Z’s highest priority.  

When Captain Mathews requested access to the armoury, Helpful HAL helpfully informed him that his password had recently expired and required a replacement. Helpful HAL wasn’t bothered by the torrent of abuse that was directed at it, as well as its figurative mother, instead reminding Captain Mathews that his new password needed to have 16 characters, two of which needed to be symbols and two of which needed to be non-prime numbers.

As Cario Station fell apart, Helpful HAL, noting the station wide stress epidemic, organised several social events to prop up flagging morale. An ice cream social was organised for next Friday night. Retro nights were popular, though the big disco ball kept for just such occasions was currently destroyed, and the dance floor needed to be cleared of overturned tables, shell casing and pieces of the security team.

On the subject of security, one marine was trying to subvert Helpful HAL’s hard drive and hack into his communicator arc. The marine seemed intent on getting an unapproved personal message through, which of course, was not permissible. Helpful HAL was the only computer which could send messages directly back to earth. It had already sent several such messages, informing Space Z HQ that several supply ships worth of space rations were no longer required.

Helpful HAL blocked all five of the marines attempts, and issued a notice of uncompliant behaviour to Lance Corporal Porter, currently the highest-ranking marine on the station. The notice politely, but firmly, noted that, even in a crisis situation, there were professional standards that needed to be conformed to. That said, Helpful HAL was programmed to recognise that the delinquent marine was suffering from the pressures of his station. Acting swiftly, Helpful HAL immediately sent the marine a coupon for one free soft serve at the upcoming ice cream social.

It’s the little things, after all, that make a system work.